Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway

"Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood." - Marie Curie

At first, I was in doubt whether or not I would attend meeting at Jakarta Advanced Toastmasters Club (JATC) last Friday night. However, since the club's meeting is held only once a month, I then forced myself to go. "At least, I could meet some friends I seldom see," I said to myself. I also reassured myself that it's always useful to be present at any Toastmasters meetings as there are always important lessons to be learned.

It was quite a surprise for me when Toastmasters of the Meeting (TOM) announced that theme of the day was Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. "It was the title of a book, wasn't it?" I exclaimed. The room went quiet for few seconds as nobody responded to my statement. Finally, when I had a chance to ask our TOM where did she find those beautiful words, she replied that it was from internet.

On the way home, I kept asking myself, "Why is the book so special for me? It was twelve years ago when I read it and yet I still couldn't forget its title." Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway is a book written by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. It was in 1997 when I bought and read it. At that time, I was on the verge of leaving my professional career as I had decided to became a full-time mother for my children. Just blame all the parenting books I had read before I came up with one of the the bravest decisions I ever made in my life. It might not easy leaving the career you had been striving to achieve for years and become a stay-at-home mother instead.

So, what I was afraid of at that time?

1. Would I be able to cope with the changing activity? I means from working outside to working at home?
2. Would I be able to educate and raise my children properly?
3. Would I be able to help my children develop self-learning ability?
4. Could I lead a happy life?
   

Fortunately, Susan's book came at the right time. Firstly, I started with a small step in handling my fear. I spent more time reading motivational and inspirational books. My own library kept growing so fast. If you think that it might be costly to buy those books - you are right. However, I could't think of a better invesment to make. Now, I reap what I sow. Because of the the books I read, I was able to move myself from a position of pain to a position of power.

Next, I learned how to take charge of myself, not blaming anyone else for anything I am being, doing, having or feeling. It started with the end of your mind. But how? Stop feeding yourself with negative thoughts, especially when dealing with your children. If you want them to be successful in their study and personal growth, you've got to have enough information on how to do the 'parenting' right. Always send positive message and believe that they can do it.

At last, I always expand my "comfort zone". I dare to try new things to improve my ability. And, being a Toastmasters has helped me become a better person. After what I've learned in Toastmasters, it's time for me to give back what I've got by sharing my knowledge and experience with others, giving away praise and giving away time to help others.

So, fear is really not a problem if we know how to cope with it.